just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
