So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
