Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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