We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
