Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
