It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
