Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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