operation harelip BJ is a go
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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