I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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