Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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