Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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