If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
