I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
