so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
worst night to have a conscience
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
