walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
