Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
