everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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