I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Randomize
