Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
