Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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