Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
