is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
