I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize
