WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
