Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
