if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
