There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
