Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
