You work out of a Hotel?
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I understand Curling. That high.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Randomize
