Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
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