Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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