Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize