even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize