STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
