the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Im part way to drunk.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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