She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She even gives head with a lisp.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
