alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
