The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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