I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
