I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Another day, another engagement, another cat
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
