Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
