Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize