The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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