I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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