About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize