She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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