and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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