Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
