i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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