So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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