Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
